My reaction to the article “So Sexy So Soon” (Levin, D. E., & Kilbourne, J. (2009),
was not really shock since I have been working with children for the past 10
years and noticing myself their sexual evolution. When I was 12 years old in
1994, I was still happily playing with Barbie dolls and my mother was still
picking out my clothes. Today, 12 year old girls are texting their boyfriends,
watching 16 and Pregnant and their
clothing is just small scale adult clothing.
As a parent, I am
careful not to expose my daughter to material or media that I don’t feel she is
ready to comprehend. The problem is I cannot control what kind of exposure she
gets at school from her friends and peers. My daughter was in 3rd
grade this past school year when. One day I went to have lunch with her at
school and was shocked by some of the things I heard the girls saying. Right in
front of me they were talking about who everyone’s boyfriend was and if you
didn’t have a boyfriend you weren’t pretty. My jaw almost dropped hearing 8 and
9 year old girls talk like this! I couldn’t help but open my mouth and tell the
girls that having a boyfriend doesn’t make you pretty, that beauty comes from
within and is reflected in how you treat others. These girls just about laughed
in my face. After returning that afternoon to pick my daughter up from school,
I talked to her all the way home about how wrong those girls were. I assured
her that they had been misinformed and that all the things I always told her
about feeling good about your self were correct. She didn’t seem to take the
girls seriously, but who’s to say that mom won’t eventually lose to the views
of her peers. In reality I was scared to
death for my daughter and these young girls who are already being taught that
acceptance from men determine your value as a woman.
Another extremely scary
example that I noticed in my own classroom, was of two 6 year old girls playing
out scenes from the reality show 16 and
Pregnant in the home living area. For those who don’t know, this
documentary series that airs on MTV follows teenage girls as they prepare to
give birth to their first child while still in high school. The series was
meant to show the hardships the girls will endure, but instead has turned the
girls who appear on the show in reality TV stars, in turn glorifying teen
pregnancy. When the girls in my classroom were imitating these girls in their
play, they began talking about what they are going to do when they are 16 and
have their babies!
Shopping for clothing
for my 9 year old daughter has become another challenge. When we go to her
favorite kids clothing store for girls (I won’t name the store) I have a
difficult time finding her age appropriate clothing. When we went shopping for
summer clothes, I was shocked to see the array of crop tops, teeny tiny bikinis
and bootie shorts in sizes small enough for 5 and 6 year old girls. Of course I
forbid these selections for my daughter, but the fact that this type of clothing
is being geared toward young children is appalling to me.
“Children growing up today are
bombarded from a very early age with graphic messages about sex and sexiness in
the media and popular culture.” Levin,
D. E., & Kilbourne, J. (2009) I feel that if we do not try and combat what children
are seeing in the media about sex, that we are going to have a generation of
teen parents and young adults who do not understand the realities of sex and
relationships. It is my job as a parent and an educator to minimize my child
and my student’s exposure to this negative material.
References
Levin, D.
E., & Kilbourne, J. (2009). [Introduction]. So sexy so soon:
The new sexualized childhood and what parents can do to protect their kids (pp. 1-8). New York:
Ballantine Books. Retrieved from:http://dianeelevin.com/sosexysosoon/introduction.pdf
Hello April!
ReplyDeleteMy daughter is now 21 years old and I can relate to how difficult it was to try to find age appropriate clothing for her. When she was younger I would shop at Mervyn's Department store and I was pleased with the clothing line they had for young girls and boys. Once my daughter became older and attended Jr. High school, the battle begun. Everything was strapless, back-outs, and the shorts were right at the thigh. My daughter was kind of a late bloomer so she was not feeling the fashion trend that was going on at that time. It became difficult to find clothing that both of us were pleased with. It is saddening to know that the media and large corporations are forcing our children to dress and fit into a certain type of style when they are just children. I mentioned earlier how I had children singing this real trendy song last week. The beat was very catchy and I could see why children were singing it. I believe that the big-wigs feed off of contaminating the younger generation. That is why we as parents have to make sure that we are telling our children what's right from what's wrong. Yes, our children will have the pressure of friends, television, video games, and cell phone but we have to make sure that we teach them the right way. There is a scripture in the Bible that states "Train up a child in the right way and he shall not depart". This Bible verse is very much relevant to the misconceptions that are children will have to face from day-to-day. Thanks for sharing!
Cotati
Cotati,
ReplyDeleteAll of the situations you discussed I can relate to. I was just like you at the age of 12, playing with Barbies and wearing my sisters hand me downs. The last thing I was thinking about was having all of the boyfriends and looking pretty for them. Speaking of shopping, I went shopping for my 8 year old niece and you are exactly right about the clothing choices they have to offer. I didn't feel comfortable having her try on booty shorts so we opted for a lot of the summer maxi dresses. It is ashame that these types of styles are appealing to these young children and unfortunate that many of the moms buy them for them to wear and fit in.
Caitlin
April,
ReplyDeleteGood for you for sending that message to your daughter that having a boyfriend is not what makes you pretty unfortunately this is the message that our media and society is sending to young children. As far as the clothing is concerned I myself was shocked at some of the outfits I saw in the store when shopping with my niece and the more I thought about it I realized that even when I go shopping for myself at stores that appeal to younger women and teens I struggle to find a shirt that covers my whole body and i wind up leaving in frustration. This is the message we send to young teenage girls and preteens that in order to look cute you need to be half dressed and it is so sad that children absorb these messages in that context and then get picked on by peers if they have parents who like you will not allow them to walk around so sexually dressed. I know that we cannot shield them from all these messages but we can teach them that how they dress and weather they have a boyfriend does not define their self worth.