My Supports

My support system is my family. I cannot imagine what my life would be like without them. My parents have supported me over my entire life span, in whatever way I may have needed at that time. When I gave birth to my daughter they were there. My Mother spent the night in the hospital with me for three nights without even going home to take a bath, just because I wanted her there. She stayed with me for two weeks after my daughter was born to help with anything I needed. My parents encouraged me while I worked full time, took care of my daughter and went back to school to earn my Bachelor’s degree. Two years ago I had a disc replacement and fusion. My mother stayed with me until they wheeled me into the operating room and they were waiting in my room when I finally came out of recovery. The next morning my Dad was walking into my hospital room at 6:00 am to make sure I was ok. I could go on and on about all the times my parents have been there for me.

On a daily basis my family supports me by being there if I need them. My mom gives me cooking advice, my Dad gives me car advice, my sister and I share parenting problems and solutions and my brother is just there to always tell me how much he loves me.

A challenge that I can imagine myself having is having limited mobility. This is a situation that I was in for a short period of time. Being a very independent person, needing help on a daily basis was very hard for me. I can only imagine what it would be like if my mobility was impaired permanently. Two years ago I began having severe muscles spasms in my neck. One day it got so bad that I could not move my neck at all or use my right arm or hand. I couldn't  sit still from the pain. It was shooting from my neck to my hand. After going to the emergency room and having a cat scan a couple weeks later it was determined that I had two herniated discs that need to be removed. The pressure on the surrounding nerves was beginning to cause damage to the nerves in my hand and arm. I had to wait 4 weeks before I could have surgery. During this time, I could barley use my right arm. I needed help with doing household chores, cooking and I even needed to reduce my responsibilities at work. After the operation I needed the same kind if help that I required before surgery while I waited for my body to heal. Before and during my recovery my parents aided me in every way they could. My mom came to my house to clean and cook meals. My Dad brought by groceries and was there to offer his support.

Even though I am now weeks away from begin 32 years old, I still need my parents. I think as a parent you spend 18 years raising your child and the rest of your life being there to support them. 

My Connections to Play

These two quotes below sum up my childhood and how I feel about play in childhood. These quotes also appeal to me because they were both said by two people who I watched on TV as a child.  The first quote was said by Bill Cosby; The Cosby Show was one of the first shows that portrayed an African American family as educated, upper middle class and functioning happily. I have fond memories of my family and I sitting and watching it together.

The second quote was by Fred Rogers, someone who I watched on TV every day as a child. Mr. Rogers Neighborhood was a pioneer of children’s educational television. Back when there was no cable television, educational programming was scarce. Shows like Mr. Roger’s Neighbor hood and Sesame Street were staples in my childhood.

“The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic.”
Bill Cosby 
“Play is often talked about as if it were a relief from serious learning. But for children play is serious learning. Play is really the work of childhood.”
Fred Rogers 

If I could imagine myself as a child, in a place by myself  with no cares or worries and the ability to play all day I would be on the beach. The only things I would need would be a bucket and shovel. I would dig in the sand all day and play in the ocean. I would dig holes and fill them with buckets of ocean water. I would not need any adult assistance in this situation. Just me and the outdoors.

When I was younger the person who most supported my efforts in play was my mother. She gave me the ability to play freely; to be loud, to make a mess and to explore. As long as I wasn’t doing anything dangerous, she allowed me to be free. Now as an adult I realize that was the best thing she could have done for me. I learned and expressed myself trough my play and she fostered that by giving me the freedom to do it.

As I parent my own daughter,  I try to remember how my mother allowed me to play and do the same for my daughter. Now a days people believe that teacher based instruction is the primary way that children learn. There are formal instructional kits teaching infants how to read and teaching preschoolers how to teach foreign languages. I think parents are afraid to just let there children play freely for fear that they won’t be as smart or able to keep up with the next child.

I hope that as I continue to raise my own daughter, I reflect upon my own childhood and allow my child to play the way I did.